Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Compartmentalizing

This is a new skill I'm trying to master and I'm quite satisfied with myself for getting this far. I sort of have two lives right now and those two lives have a billion different components that are spread out all around me and far away from me and I have to be responsible or at least mindful of all of them. That run-on sentence alone gives me anxiety.

To cope I'm attempting to think very small. It's hard because I'm a big picture thinker by nature, but it's been a revelation for my state of mind. Right now I have two more papers to write, a movie to see (The Black Swan), one potluck to host and a plane to catch Saturday morning.

Once I get home Saturday I have presents to buy, interviews, business meetings, lunches, a little boy to smother and a grandma to take care of. I have to update everyone on her situation and then get out of the house as soon as possible. She needs to be away from people to recover, so B and I are spending the holidays elsewhere.

It's a lot but I'm doing really well, actually. Everything seems to be in its place and I'm taking it hour by hour, day by day. Plowing ahead and reveling in the moment. This is a huge deal for me. I've made major strides in the last six months toward maturity and grace under pressure. I'm trying to be a better, stronger, kinder, braver person. Oh, I have so, so far to go, yes, but the fact that I'm not in the fetal position in bed right now gives me hope that I'm getting somewhere.

FYI:

That terrible movie we saw was The Warriors Way. My friend Ben arranged this double date for us and picked out the movie. Never again. I think it may actually be the worst distributed film (because festival films don't count) I've ever seen. You've been warned.

FYI the second:

SPAGHATTA TACA (the title of a previous post) was in reference to this:

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/02/spaghatta-nadle.html

You're welcome.

3 comments:

  1. As long as you take things one step at a time, you'll be fine! And I'll definitely be staying away from "The Warriors Way." Thanks for letting us know!

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  2. SPAGHATTA NADLE!!!!! Tell your g-ma i love her and i'm keeping her in my prayers!

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  3. You should spend the holiday with MEEE!!! :) Please oh please tell me I'll see you!

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