Thursday, December 8, 2011

Radvent Day 8: Comfort

Personally, I'm a fan of comfort. When we're comfortable we're able to open ourselves up to wonderful things like love, sparks of creativity and new ideas (I think that being closed minded and being insecure go hand-in-hand and I love the feeling when I'm comfortable enough to let go of my pride and learn something new or change my outlook on something). Comfort is where we run when life gets hard and we need to heal. I think it's super important, as long as we don't always live in it. Some things that give me comfort are:

- My leopard blanket
When I was 18 I had a traumatic experience and I wrapped myself up in a blanket that my friend had left at my house, and hid till it was over. She never took the blanket back and we have been inseparable ever since.
- Ramen noodles
So, so bad. I refuse to keep them in the house but, when I am having a spectacularly terrible day and/or horrible period cramps, I will drag my weary bones to the grocery store for a pack of Ramen noodles. That's right, not the $10 ramen dinner from the restaurant, the $0.89 Top Ramen. When I was a kid and stayed home alone, I made them for myself. I guess they are my comfort food. This one is vegan and, when mixed with tofu and frozen mixed veggies, can cure anything that ails me:
- Baz Luhrmann's Romeo + Juliet
My cure for insomnia since I was 12. I know every single second of it by heart.
- movies from another time
Old foreign movies on a regular basis keep me sane. I can't explain it, so I'm not even going to try. All I know is that sometimes I go a couple weeks without watching a movie and then I crawl into bed and pop in something quiet with subtitles, and I realize that for those couple weeks life hadn't been as good as it could be. On sad/"I don't want to be a grownup" days, it's often musicals or Molly Ringwald that I need.
- Nonny
My beautiful, perfect kitty purring next to me is bliss.
- Talks with Taso 
When we discuss a film, concept, idea, plan, the past, the future, the weather... whatever. It reminds me of when we were first getting to know each other and falling in love. We were so young and so fascinated by each other. Also comforting: his smell, which has never changed. Little Taso and Brittan of 2007:
- B's routine
You give your child a routine so that they feel secure. You realize, when you and your child are separated, how secure that routine also makes you feel.
- rain
I'm happiest in cold, drizzly weather.

Two things I would like to do that would break me out of my comfort zone:

1. Direct a film
(A bunch of people giving of their time and talent to make my vision -- which may or may not suck -- come to life is so scary!)
2. Ask for money
(I can't even handle it when Taso pays for everything, how will I ever learn to fundraise?)

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